974
February 7th, 2008 | 
Author: 974 is not just a random number, this is the number of days since my wonderful daughter was born. 974 days or 139 weeks or 32 months (tomorrow). It’s been an experience that is for sure and honestly I wouldn’t change a second of it.
It’s also a figure for something else, it’s the amount of time I have been breastfeeding. Every day for 974 days Rebecca has taken some mummy’s milk. Even when i was in labor with her sister she still took a feed. For 15 of those months i have been tandem feeding, an amazing experience which i hope to be repeating again in around 31 weeks.
For the moment though i feel its time for Rebecca to wean, i have loved feeding her and has never been ashamed at still feeding my toddler. I have always believed in the recommendation by the world health organization. They advise breastfeeding should be done for at lease two years and then for as long as both mother and child are happy.
Here lies my problems Im no longer happy feeding Rebecca, my skin crawls and i spend every second wishing it was over. More than once i have hurt her feelings by refusing or stopping as soon as she started. This is not a new feeling and has been coming and going since last summer, i have kept going with one goal in mind - to have her still breastfeeding this summer when she goes for more throat surgery. This pregnancy has changed that though, my milk supply is decreasing daily and im sure by then i will be more or less completely dry. In my head and my heart i feel its time.
She no longer feeds like crazy in fact 5 days out of 7 she takes two short feeds a day - one before nap and one before bed . I have spoken with my heath visitor about it and she recommend cold turkey which i also feel is the only way to handle it.
Our sleep time routine at the moment means i go on the computer and feed Eilidh then put her down, Rebecca stays in the living room watching “In the Night Garden”. When Eilidh is down Rebecca gets milk while i read email and gets rocked to sleep in my arms -this is going to be the issue. For the moment i think we are going to have to break the computer - milk association , after Eilidh is down im going to bring Rebecca into the bed with me and we will read a special bedtime book (to be chosen this week) . Im trying to not take away her mummy time, she still gets the cuddles and special time just not with milkies.
Im not expecting the easiest of times with it, thankfully DH will be able to help if needed in the evenings but i have a feeling naptime will be a struggle. That is the one im dreading, naps are hit and miss as is and im afraid taking the milk away will result in her giving them up altogether. I love naptime.
So we have set a date, Monday the 11th of February. Sunday night she will snuggle in my arms and take what will hopefully be her last breastfeed at 978 days old. I love the idea of letting her self wean but am aware that the relationship between mother and daughter is more important, i want to be able to cuddle my girl without worrying she will ask for milk.
Eilidh im hoping will continue to feed for at least another year or so, i have no issues with her feeding what’s so ever and really want to be providing her with the benefits till she is at least 2.
My heart is breaking over this even though i know im doing the right thing
Posted in Uncategorized
February 7th, 2008 7:36 am
I think its great that you have nursed so long!
I worry that it will be extra hard to wean Rebecca when she sees Ellidh still nursing. She may think, “Hey!!! She still gets milk from mommy, why not me???”
Maybe you could have Rebecca do something special when Ellidh is nursing, that only “big girls” can do. Maybe tell her nursing is for babies and she is clearly not a baby anymore. It could be something as simple a s a sticker book that she doesn’t have to share. Good luck I hope it goes smoothly for you!
February 7th, 2008 8:48 am
I agree I think you are amazing for doing it so long. I was wondering about that, how your poor body would keep up with a pregnancy and two kids nursing. I wish you the best of luck and hope Rebecca takes it well. I also agree that she should have something special for a big girl to do while you are nursing Eilidh so she doesn’t get jealous.
February 7th, 2008 2:06 pm
I’m so sorry that you are having to do this… this was never an issue for me because my milk never came in… hugs… I hope this is an easy transition for you both!
February 7th, 2008 7:25 pm
My kids weaned themselves, I was so sad when my youngest quit nursing. She NEVER liked it. She was desperate to be out of my arms and into what the older 5 kids were doing.
Such a sad day for me!
February 7th, 2008 10:44 pm
You have done amazing to make it almost three years! I hope this transition goes well for you…it definitely sounds like it’s the right thing if you’re no longer comfortable with it. I sometimes wish I’d continued longer with Nadia; she was 15 months when she self-weaned and has now been NOT breastfeeding for as long as she did breastfeed. but I miss it.
February 8th, 2008 2:40 pm
Good luck!!
February 8th, 2008 8:41 pm
Good luck! I’ve never weaned, but I think your plan about the special mommy book time sounds like a good one.
February 10th, 2008 8:00 am
I think you are amazing !
Hope everything goes well.
February 11th, 2008 6:00 pm
Good luck with it all, I know it can be a struggle. I’m trying to introduce cow’s milk to my youngest and he just despises it, even when I warm it. *sigh*