Synchronization of Us

All i can is thankful its over.

It seemed so much worse than last time, i honestly thought it would be easier as we all knew what to expect but in the end i think that was the problem.
Rebecca was a star, she had only been 3 for not even 3 weeks and she just shows a maturity way beyond her years. She handled everything in such a dignified , beautiful way and just brings tears to my eyes thinking about it.

She knew what was going on and up till the moment they tried to put her under she was ok with it, DH went in with her this time (Rebecca’s request) and said it was horrible. They tried to put the mask over her face and she just struggled like crazy.
It was afterwards that really got to us all, normal procedure is to start to bring the child around then go and get the parents. By the time we are there they are just waking up , this time Rebecca came to a little early and just panicked.
By the time we got to her she was in a complete mess, she was struggling for breath and worrying us all. She went to Craig and just lost herself in his arms, she would stop crying and start to fall back asleep but her breathing was still all “wrong”. You know the way you get when you are really upset? Unable to catch your breath and gasping all the time? . Even once seemingly calm she was still doing this, you could see her throat collapse with each breath and her stomach muscles working hard.
We remained in the recovery room, just holding her and waiting till the surgeon was finished with surgery he was currently doing . Her stats remains steady and a nurse sat with us the entire time “just in case” . After a while she asked for a dummy , i did have some but those were in her hospital bag which was already in the ward. The hospital provided one and this helped alot, about an hour or so passed out and she slept soundly her breathing getting better and better.

Eventually we were allowed to leave and go up to the ward, she was awake and doing well . We think she had forgotten about the earlier incident and was hungry and wanting juice. She spent the afternoon lying around not really doing much at all, well except eat . Who says a little thing like throat surgery would come between someone and there food?

Around 4 she fell asleep again, she really did need this. All afternoon you could just tell how tired she was, when we woke her up at 5 she was just in a great mood. We removed the oxygen thing from her foot so she could walk around and play freely, she eat her dinner (and got upset when it was done) and was thrilled when her gran came for a visit.
She played around for hours , finally falling asleep around 10pm (i was SHATTERED and think i fell asleep even before she did) . Although we did have our own beds we slept curled up in my little one, between the cramped space , heat and noise i felt i barely slept at all.
By morning she was almost normal (except for her breathing still sounding off, almost like she is out of breath all the time. More on this in a moment) and we got home a few hours later. Yet again i think her favorite part was getting the IV removed and getting her circle plaster.

So that was that, but what did she actually get done? It was really the same as before, Dr K used lasers to separate the scar tissue that had rejoined. It was a ” vigorous ” procedure according to the doctor, even more so than before which has resulted in more swelling and hence the breathing issues.
None of us are very hopefully that it will work , even he was surprised that the previous surgery had done nothing to help (had made things slightly worse even ) and could see her throat was still inflamed from it . He is just wanting to try what he can before embarking on a more invasive procedure.

He is wanting to leave things for a while, he will see her back in two months at a clinic and we will discuss where to go from there. Maybe after a while when things really start healing we will see an improvement but we are trying not to expect to much .
Next step is using a tube in her throat for aslong as she can tolerate it , its a bigger surgery than the one she had done , he is hoping to do it endoscopicly (think thats how its spelt, basically not actually cutting her throat just going through her mouth) although he did admit he has only done it like this once before. She would have to spend a couple of days - maybe 2 or 3 - in hospital after it .
This would all be done after the baby is born which does mean DH staying with her rather than me but we will work out the details when it happens.

Just now we are just taken each day as it comes, we have two months till we have to think about it again and have so much more to focus on. At the moments we have strict orders to keep an eye on her breathing and try to get her to relax and rest as much as we can (Ha Ha, ever tried to get a 3 year old to not run around and play? TV and staying home helps but they still don’t stop much) .

She is doing great though , looking at her you would never know what she went through yesterday.