Balance

This is a key word around my home just now. Im trying to balance so many different “balls” and for the most part actually managing to not drop any.

Its hard you see, i have three children with different needs not to mention nobody has invented the self cleaning home yet . I seem to go from one thing to another and i know the poor girls get neglected a little . I have been trying to end the day with them, yesterday we done sticker and autumn leave pictures then danced and horsed around . Today i was not needed as Courtney had them involved in a game that i would only have ruined.
Sometimes i feel torn in a thousand different directions , tonight while trying to feed the girls while cleaning the kitchen and keeping Ru happy. After the baths all THREE kids were in tears – this is the part i hate more than anything , all kids upset and me unable to do anything about it .
Ok sure i can fix all the problems but just not at once, by that point all three were just so tired that only sleep would help. Its now 6.55pm and all three are sound.

For the most part i think i am managing well , the house has not caved in around me yet and the kids seem to be adjusting to everything really well. Im still feeling like the luckiest person in the world and have random moments when i cannot stop the tears (of happiness ) .

Ru is just growing and changing so much , he is at least 12lbs now and finally settling down with the feeds – he can go a few hours between feeding and does not scream if anyone else is holding him. We dragged the play mat out yesterday and he loves it, he lies and bats at the toys in amazement ( i think mostly accidental as he moves his arms and legs alot normally when awake) . He makes these cutest baby noises and the first proper smile is only days away. He loves the sling and to be cuddled full stop, we co-sleep at night and as a result i get plenty of sleep (mind you last night he slept in his moses basket till 3am and might have went longer but he woke me making noise and i just grabbed him in beside me). He is the perfect addition to our family.

The girls are also amazing, Rebecca had her first proper speech therapy class today. Im so glad she is finally getting the help she needs in that area. Lately though she is seeming so grown up , the way she carries herself lately seems to change .Im guessing its nursery making her seem older, she is also finally out of nappies (well accept for night time – she was more or less toilet trained before the hospital thing but that really set her back) .
Eilidh is just Eilidh, a wonderful and funny little girl with boundless energy and wit. She is in a major NO phase right now and just entertains everyone with her chatting and giggles. She to is seeming so big at the moment. She was standing the other day with a skirt on that was a little short (she had ,had tights on which disguised this but had taken them off) and had put on her wellies – watching her from behind i just got a vision of her in 14 years time as a teenage girl with the to short skirt and knee high boots and just wanted to cry .

I guess my kids are all growing up , one of these days im going to turn around and they will all be grown and have families of there own. Im just wanting to enjoy these days while they last.